


When Thirsty

by atomicmayo



Series: Dewmie Fictober 2019 Fills [6]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Consent, Enthusiastic Consent, First Time, Kissing, M/M, Relationship Discussions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-06
Updated: 2019-10-06
Packaged: 2020-11-27 04:00:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20941919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/atomicmayo/pseuds/atomicmayo
Summary: From the Fictober 2019 Prompt: "Yes, I'm aware. Your point?" Bill and Jamie's first attempts at intimacy turn into a discussion about consent.





	When Thirsty

Coals glowed dimly in the fireplace. Bill's living room was otherwise dark except for the tiny bit of purple light from reflected clouds and the odd streetlamp filtering through the window. A rainstorm tapped against the window pane and accompanied the sound of water rushing out of a drainpipe on an outside corner of the house.

Jamie was focused on none of this.

He had finally gotten the chance - through years of dashed hopes, rejection and outright fantasy - to have what he wanted. Now that chance was here, Jamie wanted to relish every second of it.

"You know," he purred indulgently and placed a kiss on Bill’s cheek, "how often I’ve-" and another kiss, "thought about-" and another, "kissing your cheeks?"

Bill couldn’t answer; the only intelligible words he could form in his mind was something like, _oh how it spectacular it is to drown in him like this_, and even that couldn’t make it from Bill's brain to his mouth. Cool, slender hands and soft lips seemed to be constantly moving, pressing, _exploring_ him in the dark - incessant and unyielding. Bill threaded his hands through Jamie's hair as he tried and failed to think. Jamie tilted his head into the warmth radiating from Bill's fingertips and into his scalp, flooding all the way down his spine. Jamie soon continued in his very important work and diligently made sure to give the other side of Bill’s face an equal amount of attention as the side now tingling with kisses, but soon paused.

"Oop, you missed a spot shaving this morning, I think," Jamie cooed and brushed his lips against a little bit of stubble toward the side of Bill’s jaw. Bill whimpered and trembled at it. He could feel hands slowly begin to play with the buttons toward the top of his shirt.

He started to fight through the haze. "Jamie? This is our first time being close like this..." he tried gently.

"Yes, I’m aware," Jamie breathed, teasing a button with his thumb, "your point?"

"It’s, um," the remaining words died in Bill’s throat and were soon resurrected as a string of shivering, pathetic vowels as Jamie started nibbling his ear. Jamie took his lips off of him just long enough to whisper, "seems like I found a sensitive spot...!"

Bill quickly grabbed Jamie’s sides and Jamie beamed down at him, reveling in the touch - practically squirming.

"My point is uh…" Bill tried again but Jamie's sigh cut him off.

"Your hands are so warm...!"

Bill held him there just firmly enough to keep Jamie from crawling completely on top of him. Jamie let out a little 'oh' at the sudden resistance.

"Jamie! Can we talk about this, please?" Bill finally gasped, voice cracking.

"Huh?"

"I’m sorry. Don’t get me wrong - I am enjoying this. It’s incredible," he said wistfully as his eyes swept over Jamie’s lithe form in the dim light. Bill fought the urge to apply the slightest bit of pressure with his hands, just to see how Jamie would respond.

"_You’re_ incredible. It’s just--" Bill struggled for a moment and Jamie eventually settled back, out of Bill’s grip. 

"Too fast," Jamie guessed, voice dropping low.

"Yeah," Bill replied, trying to keep his own voice even through shaky breaths. 

Jamie drew his leg up to his chest and wrapped an arm around his knee. 

"I'm sorry. I guess I got a little over-eager," he mumbled, still flushed. He ran his free hand through his hair; a little out of place from Bill’s handiwork, and began fidgeting at an old blanket draped over the arm of the sofa. Red and blue knit faded to purple and black in the darkness.

"You weren’t over-eager," Bill urged, "you’re passionate - and it’s amazing!" He threw his hands up as he spoke, "it was just going a little too quickly for me, is all."

Jamie smirked through his sudden bout of sheepishness, offering, "too hot to handle?"

Bill gave a wide-eyed nod. "Yeah, but give me time," he dropped his voice a bit, "you’d be surprised how much heat I can get used to," he finished, punctuating it with a wink.

They both managed to laugh and take a couple deep breaths. Bill threw another piece of wood on the fire to distract himself for a moment and it crackled back to life.

"Are you okay?" He asked after a minute or so.

"Yeah, I’m glad you said something," Jamie admitted. He took another second to recover his confidence before dropping his knee from his chest to turn toward Bill and ask, "so, how slowly would you like to go?"

"I’m not sure, exactly," Bill answered with a wince. He hugged himself in thought for a moment and started to muse aloud, looking out the window into the rain outside, "this is all so new to me! I haven’t gotten close to anybody in a very long time," he paused for a second, rubbed his arm nervously, and added, "-and if this is going where I think it is, it will be the first time I’ve been… intimately involved with a…"

"Thespian?" Jamie finished.

"No, no, a mailman. I mean a male... _man_," Bill suddenly stopped, screwed his face up and finished weakly, "another gentleman, that is."

"Oh," Jamie murmured dumbly, mentally kicking himself.

"I don’t want to mess it up, you see," Bill added.

"Of course not - and neither do I," Jamie said quickly, "I guess uh," he rubbed the back of his neck, "my relationships with other guys up to this point have just sort of fallen into this end of things."

"'Less talk, more action', huh?"

"Yeah, I shouldn’t have assumed you’re the same as the guys I’ve been with in the past, though. It isn’t fair to you - or me, come to think of it." 

There was just enough ruefulness at the end of Jamie’s remark to prompt a tug of curiosity in the back of Bill’s mind somewhere, but he pushed it aside for the moment. Bill was a big fan of the 'removing a band-aid' method of telling the truth if he had to tell the truth at all, so he pressed on: "the other thing is you’re younger and well, I don’t want to just try something and you feel pressured to let me do it to you because you’re worried I might get mad or I have _power_ over you in some way and I--"

Jamie abruptly grabbed his shoulder to stop him. "Woah, woah, your turn to slow down! I get taking it easy at first because I'm the first guy you've dated, but you’re worried about me being able to _fully consent_, too? You do realize I was just about to start--"

Bill laughed nervously, "I know! And I was a hair's breadth away from letting you!"

"Wait. Are you concerned about me getting mad if _you say no to me_, too?" Jamie asked quickly, worry seeping into his voice.

"I-I don’t know. I _do_ trust you, I don’t think you’d do anything out of spite if I said no - that's why I stopped you when I was able to, I suppose, but--" he trailed off.

"It’s still scary, isn't it? Trusting people."

"Yes," Bill admitted. Jamie was just able to make out a furrowed brow.

"Maybe I shouldn't have brought this up," Bill said softly as he clasped his hands together and wrung them, "I didn't want to make you feel bad, or 'kill the mood', or--"

"Hey, it's okay, you didn't do any of that," Jamie inhaled, looking at the ceiling to collect his thoughts for a second, and continued, "and yeah, you’re older, but we're both certainly adults. Part of that is being able to talk about what we do and don’t want. If you're doing something, on purpose or not, that’s forcing my hand in some way, I won't hold back - I'll tell you."

Bill managed to nod.

"And I expect you to do the same," Jamie added, "a ‘yes’ isn't a yes to me if it's under pressure, all right?" Jamie offered his hand and Bill squeezed it briefly.

"Okay."

"So," Jamie ventured, "if I might want to be a little more intimate with you, what should I do?"

Bill chewed the inside of his cheek, "ask, I guess? Talk to me? I'm not always so good at that myself, but," he smiled, "maybe, at least slow down enough for me to stop you!" He said with a satisfied nod and pointed resolutely, but then added, "oh and that thing where you were kind of playing with my shirt? I... liked that, a lot," he blushed, "but it also was slow enough for me to at least _start_ to say something to you. That was good!"

Jamie brought his fingers to his mouth in thought for a moment.

"Hm, okay," he finally said, "this - it’s a lot more explicit than I’m used to, but I think that might be a good thing."

Bill's eyes darted back and forth for a second before he dared to ask, "explicit like," he cleared his throat, "‘sexual’? We didn't really get far enough into it for..."

Jamie chuckled, "no, I wasn't referring to that, exactly - not yet, anyway," he mimicked the same cheesy voice Bill was doing earlier and it got Bill to crack a smile, "but you know - clearly asked for? It would definitely slow things down a little, but I'm willing to try it."

They both fell quiet and stared into the fire for a minute, processing. Soon, Bill scooted a little closer and arranged his arm around the back of the sofa in a way that lined up with a spot between Jamie’s shoulder blades, mentally bracing himself.

"Slowing down like this might make things a little tense. Are you sure you’re okay with that?" he asked, cautiousness making his voice gravelly.

"Definitely," Jamie replied, locking eyes with him. The test run continued, "I kind of like a little tension, providing you’re okay with it, that is…?"

"Oh yeah, I don't think I'll mind that at all," Bill answered through a smile and moved closer. As Jamie did the same, Bill's cautious expression faded into something softer. Bill closed in and let his fingers graze between Jamie’s shoulder blades lightly, questioningly. Just before Bill’s face started to brush against Jamie’s hair, Jamie pinpointed Bill’s expression: honest, if a bit hesitant, desire.

"May I kiss you?" Bill asked him in a breath.

Taking the breath, Jamie answered, "yes, please."

And he did.


End file.
